I am in agreement with you in prayer. But, I pray may God give you a forgiving heart and mind over time to heal and become friends eventually. May God reveal how you can be a Blessing in times of need to another by using your experience s to help someone else that might be going through. What you have already been through and can share your story to comfort another, Amen
Be a blessing to others when the time comes... God is really stressing in my Spirit to share my experience to help you through yours.
I was with my ex for 28 yrs before I left him for good. My painful memories kept coming up that would make me return back to my ex even though. Since, day one bad advice from a family member left my in a non committed relationship for 28 unhappy 😭 years.
But on the flip side God had finally, brought closure to my life. By telling me to leave him and to end it. The amount of headaches and trauma!!! Left me very numb and desensitized( with very little filter) to anyone feeling's toward the male race/species. Why... Did I use species... That is the way I felt towards men in general concerning getting into a relationship again!!!.
I was just emotionally 😭 drained. It had thrown me into a very deep depressive state. I had for the most part stopped living and was just going through the motions. With very harsh interior and exterior feelings and thoughts. With little to no emotions at all and no filters to what came out of my mouth. Very harsh words, which left my youngest, very sensitive to how she respond to things. But tries to hold it all together in front of others. But, at times the pain shows through her non- motional behaviors.
What would I have done differently, left when my mind told me too. The family member did not have my best interest at hand and it almost cost me my sanity.
I am not sure why... God had me share what I did. I try to keep alot of that hidden and behind me. But, he makes it available to those who needs to hear it. We are the best of friends now... Now, that I am able to see his ability to not be able to sit still and probably today would have been diagnosed with ADHD. But, that was way after our time. I see, things in his personality that is, even now cries out for help and he don't really know how to really ask. He was brought up with the mentality, a man is not a man, unless is show the tougher side of himself. Yet, his soul even now is calling this whole time for help.
I think it is us praying to God on their behalf asking God to reveal why... They are doing and have developed certain habits. I pray this has helped you with whatever, it is your going through and ask God to open your eyes to see what you can not concerning 😟 your relationship. So, you may better understand the why's? Alot better....
God bless you and loves you both, Amen

God has given me this word of comfort to you, establish yourself in the way I see marriage and the process of courtship. I am getting in my Spirit. Bring to me what you are desiring in a mate and we will begin from there, Amen
God does not see marriage as the world see marriage. He will teach you before marriage, how to cover your husband to be in prayer for him, covering him. Because the enemy will attack your relationship by trying to test the both of you. To see if, you are truly committed to one another, trying to hinder the two of you from coming together. He will try to bring you counterfeits to have you believe this is the person God has sent to you. Always pray when you get to this point and time. When it is your time to meet someone. There is a process God takes you through to get you both ready for each other and it brings him in the middle to help stabilize your marriage. It is under his guidance that you will know your future husband is dealing with something or he just could be feeling not at his best that day. And God will instruct you of what to do to bring his Spirit man back up.
God is so awesome and good like that, about keeping the balance betweens the two of you. Keeping each other in harmony with one another.
The process God takes you through prepares you to already be trained in the wife rule and as the two becomes one. You are already ready to take on the task, Amen
It takes patience with God, because most of the time one is more advanced in God then the other and it takes him having to awaken one or both of you. It just depends on where you are in the Lord that can shorten the process. If the both of you are established with his ways and already know going into the marriage "what God expect" then you both are ready for courtship and again, that depends on your maturity in God, Amen
P. S.
So it is a lot of variables to look at before getting married. But, seek first Gods kingdom. This is what is in my Spirit and God says he will establish you.
And so you may know, this came up in my Spirit to share... Always pray about who you think is the right person for you. Because there are some variables to consider as well:
God does not approve of a godly man or woman being married to a non-believer in Christ Jesus. The Bible speaks on this in 2 Corinthians 6:14 is what came up for me. But put in your tool bar above this title: "15 Important Bible Verses About Being Unequally Yoked" that you may learn farther about Gods view through his word. This way you may have a better understanding of his viewpoint and why he says not to marry even Certain Christian if they are not called to ministry. Because that will hinder the call on your life or theirs. There is so much I could share with you on this topic as the Lord God is leading me to do so.
But this will be a start for you to understand some of Gods ways and viewpoints towards marriage. Do he make exception, he most definitely does... I hope I have helped you in some manner or aspect of Gods view, Amen
Be blessed woman of God... God got you covered... He just wants the best for us, always ...Amen 💖

God has given me this word to share with you. Re-establish yourself first with me. You are going through the attacks from the enemy because you have been use to praising and worshipping me. And spending much needed time in my presence, but you have pulled yourself from my presence. Re-establish yourself, by going back to what you once were in the practice of doing. And the things you are praying for shall be yours, Amen

In the name of Jesus, God is saying to you today. I release you from being tormented in Spirit, in your mind and in your soul. I have come to bring life and bring it more abundantly. I release you from the tournament of your mind, will and emotions says the Lord. Release those things that is not of me says the Lord and you shall be free, Amen