Oh Betsy, I'm so happy to read this. Sometimes we over think things and don't hear Gods direction. I knew you would figure things out and I hope that EVERYTHING becomes a true blessing to all 3 of you.

I have prayed for all three of you. I truly believe that there is no meeting by chance and that God puts people in our lives and our paths for a reason. Maybe you're not suppose to be his wife per say but maybe you are to help him as a friend would. Especially with his strong hold of alcoholism and grief? You could be a great example for his sweet daughter not only a mother figure but just a good God fearing woman example? I don't have all the answers but God does so keep praying and doing what you are doing. May God grant you the wisdom you seek and direct your path.