I am sick of living according to the lust of my flesh of needing validation, of all the deceitful lusts, of needing the things i desire. I.am sick of desire. I want to let go of it. I dont know how. Pray for me please. Most of the things i desire aren't bad in themselves. But idk there is not words to describe this.

Praise God. He has put me together better than i have ever been. He picks up after me. He turns my mistakes into blessings. He causes me to grow even when cant feel or see it he's working. Throttle things matter. O lord help me be more grateful help me to be light Father. Fill my cup please. And you can have the worry the anxiety and the stress.

I repent of my bad attitude and my arrogance. Please pray for my family. We were on a vacation and I started having a sore throat and nasal congestion. I pray that my family is protected. Also I need prayer to accept myself. I am getting better at it. But i often apologize for being myself. I pray that God helps me to have identity and personality and accept who I am supposed to be. These flu like symptoms i have been experiencing has changed my attitude somewhat. I was being arrogant about the virus as if it weren't real. Being disrespectful about wearing masks. It has given me a new outlook. Now I realize what I must have looked and sounded like. Sometimes the things we perceive to be bad has a good effect. Lord i thank you for my attitude adjustment. I place my life my future my everything in your hands. I know you are good and you are greater than my emotions and perceptions and my problems. I trust you today. In jesus name amen.

Feeling sad and discouraged. I know God is who he says he is. But maybe my beliefs were off. I might have gotten my hopes up for some grandiose things out of place. Everything I thought I knew, everything I wanted to be true about MY reality with God. I wanted the life of one of the old testament heroes, I didnt want their hardships. I thought I received a word confirming some things I wanted. Now I dont know what is true anymore I am all mixed up. I thought faith and belief had effect over reality, now I dont know. I thought I was protected, now I question that. I thought i received word harvest was coming, now I feel like it was false hope. I just keep getting these messages God knows your struggle, God cares, dont grow weary in doing good. And everyone seems to prosper and i feel forgotten. My attitude is poor and I am trying to hold on. But I just dont know anymore. I want to expect the blessing to expect the favor to expect good things but now i fear getting my hopes up to get let down any more.